7 Signs That Your Inner child Is Healing
I've always been the friend people come to when they're struggling. I think it’s something about my energy, I don’t immediately jump in with advice, I just listen without trying to fix everything right away. But over the years, I've noticed the same patterns showing up again and again in the people I care about.
The stories are always different on the surface, different families, different circumstances, different triggers. But underneath, there's this common thread of people who learned early on that they weren't quite good enough as they were. That they had to earn love, approval, and acceptance instead of just receiving it.
I see it in myself too. The way I used to tie myself in knots trying to make everyone comfortable. How I'd replay texts for hours wondering if I sounded weird. The deep exhaustion from managing everyone's feelings while completely ignoring my own.
But I've discovered something watching the women in my life (and going through it myself): your inner child can actually heal from all this damage. And when she does? Your whole life shifts in ways that honestly feel kind of miraculous.
These are the signs I've noticed that show your inner child is healing:
They no longer make choices just to please others.
I watched my friend get a text from her mom asking her to come home this weekend to help with some family thing. The old version of her would've immediately typed back "of course!" even though she had plans with her fiancé ****and really needed the downtime. This time, she stared at her phone for a minute, then typed back: "I can't this weekend, but maybe I can help you plan it over the phone?" Her hands weren't even shaking. After sending it, she actually looked relieved - like she'd been holding her breath for years and finally exhaled.
They stop comparing their progress to everyone else's.
Social media used to be torture for this same person. She'd scroll through Instagram and fall into that familiar pit of "everyone is doing better than me." Every engagement announcement, job promotion, or vacation photo felt like proof she was falling behind in life.
Now when she sees those posts she rather feels happy for them. She'll genuinely smile and say "good for them" without that bitter edge. There's no more silent scorekeeping, no more measuring her worth against someone else's highlight reel. She's finally running her own race.
They care less about what other people think and focus more on themselves.
The overthinking used to be brutal. Every conversation would get replayed endlessly. "Did I say the wrong thing? Do they think I'm weird? What if they took that comment the wrong way?" Even a casual remark from a stranger could keep her up at night.
These days, she lets things roll off her back. When someone makes an offhand comment about her choices or her life, She doesn't fall into that self-doubt trap anymore. She has learned that other people's opinions say more about them than they do about her.
They don't feel the need to prove themselves constantly.
Every disagreement used to turn into a mission to prove she was right. She would spend hours writing the perfect comeback or gathering evidence to support her point. It was exhausting, always feeling like she had to justify her thoughts and feelings.
Now when someone disagrees with her, she can simply say "I see it differently" and leave it at that. Without any lenghty explanations, no desperate need to win them over. She's comfortable with people not understanding her perspective, and that confidence is beautiful to watch.
They can forgive and move on without holding grudges.
She used to keep a mental catalog of everyone who had ever hurt her. Every slight, dismissive comment, or moment of rejection stayed fresh in her mind and was ready to resurface at the smallest trigger.
I watched her run into someone who had treated her terribly in the past. They had a brief conversation, and that was it. Later she told me she felt... nothing. There wasn’t any feeling of anger, no apology, and no desire for revenge. "I don't need to carry that anymore," she said, and I could see she really meant it.
They speak up for themselves without fear or guilt.
At a family gathering, her uncle made one of his usual cutting remarks about her life choices. In the past, she would've either laughed it off or stayed silent, then spent weeks replaying the moment and wishing she had said something.
This time, she looked him directly in the eye and calmly said, "I'm proud of the life I'm building." With no explanation, and no attempt to convince him. Suddenly, the room got quiet for a second, but she didn't flinch. She had finally learned that she doesn't need anyone else's approval to feel good about herself.
They can receive compliments and love without deflecting.
Compliments used to bounce right off her. Someone would say something nice and she'd immediately deflect - "Oh, this old thing?" or "I was just lucky" or "It wasn't that great." Deep down, she didn't believe she deserved good things, so she'd push them away before they could sink in.
Now when someone compliments her work, her appearance, or who she is as a person, she simply says "thank you." She lets the warmth of their words actually reach her heart. She's finally learning that she's worthy of love and appreciation exactly as she is.
I wish I could tell you it's all smooth sailing from here, but….
Healing your inner child isn't some magical transformation where everything suddenly becomes perfect. Some days she still catches herself people-pleasing or overthinking. The difference is now she notices it happening and can redirect instead of drowning in it for weeks. The person I've been talking about isn't living some fairy tale life now. She still has bad days, still deals with difficult family dynamics, still struggles sometimes. But there's this sense of peace that wasn't there before. She's not constantly fighting herself anymore. The fact that you're even reading this means you're already on your way. If you want to finally break free from these patterns? Schedule a call and let's talk about how we can heal your inner child together.
